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5 Important Marriage

Goals for a Better 2017

 

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          It’s almost March……already? The year is quickly moving by and it’s time to take a look at how well we are doing with our 2017 goals. With the huge responsibilities of family and career, we understand how easy it can be to fall back into the current routine of daily duties and less into planning new projects and ventures. So, if you’re starting over or continuing your goals, here are 5 simple and helpful goals that will set your family up for a very successful 2017.

  1. Create a Financial Plan – A lot of couples know how it feels to be in a financial disaster, or live pay check to pay check. But, this is not the life that is designed for you. God has a bigger life of prosperity for you and its right at your finger tips. Research money savings ideas and create a healthy budget. Start a savings account, give to your local church and discuss ways on how to make extra money. Every little step will create an impact on your marriage, but you have to start now. Read “The Big Financial Trap that is Destroying Marriages” as a tool to start your greater financial future.
  2. Set a Date Night Schedule – Life can get so routine and busy that sometimes you can forget the the importance of spending one on one time together. Date Nights have proven to be a one of the most important times in a marriage. Spending time together gives you an opportunity to re-focus yourself on each other, strengthen your connection and find out fresh new things about each other. Once a week or once a month, make laughing and cuddling the priority of your date. And because dates don’t need to cost a ton of money, here are “25 Budget-Friendly Date Night Ideas” to help you get going.marriage-money
  3. Support Each Others Ideas – Does your spouse always come to you with the next “BIG IDEA”? I know, I know, it can get a little frustrating. But, what if one of those ideas is the idea that helps your family move out of your apartment and into the house you’ve always dreamed about? Or, start a college fund for your children? Key thing when listening to new ideas from your spouse is to not decide that it is a “Bad” idea so quickly. Take into consideration that your spouse has thought about and invested time into thinking of a new venture that they believe will help the family.  Ask questions, look interested and try to understand all the details. Be willing to research further with them and even test the idea with them to see if it is a healthy choice for the family.
  4. Encourage Continuing Education – With technology being at the peak of the century, continuing education can be easy. Encourage your spouse to continue learning by earning their certificates, degrees and licensing in their area of specialty. This will not only help their career, but expand the wealth of your family as well. Research online programs you can study from home like at Ashworth College. Their online learning programs such as Nursing are designed to fit into the lives of their students, which means you can progress at your own pace and find the balance between work, family, education and most importantly……your marriage. They are accredited and extremely affordable, and are five times less than other institutions. That’s a WIN for your new financial plan. SCORE! Learn more about Ashworth College.Screen Shot 2017-02-23 at 8.20.52 PM
  5. Planned Communication – Everyday you should be making an effort to talk each other about important areas in your marriage. Even if it is as little as 10 minutes. We never imagined the financial crisis we went through 12 years into our marriage. It cost us some of our most precious things, health issues and numerous sleepless nights. This simple advice would have saved us a lot money…….and tears. Keeping a consistent flow of communication will help you stay in control of things that can easily spiral out of control. Both spouses should keep a small pocket sized note pad to document things you talk about and the new ideas that you have for the future.

These tips will give your marriage and family an edge (and SUCCESS!) into the next stage of your life together. Be proactive in setting times to start these adventures and PRAY together every night that God will help you both be consistent and strengthen the connection between each other.

Check out Ashworth College for more about their college programs and flexible study schedules.

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Mark and Laquilla Lane

Husband and Wife for Life, Founders

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The Best of Me

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It’s Valentines season!!  For my family, this is a time of hand-made cards and an overload of mini reese’s butter cups! But as I started thinking about what I can give the loves in my life, I feel that the Holy Spirit reinforced the thought of giving them the best wife and mommy ever…in addition to the chocolate of course!My question to Him was, “how do I do that?” A simple, yet profound response brought me to tears. He said “Believe what I’ve said about you.  Believe that I love you and that I will take care of you.” The truth of my life isthat I’ve lived as a people-pleaser for most of it. Even though God has begun an incredible work in me through revelation of His love for me, I’ve idolized the acceptance of my parents, siblings, friends and my spouse.

An inward battle rages on as I question myself as a good wife.  I struggle at times with the idea that I can be enough to raise these beautiful and innocent children that God has blessed us with.  So in the light of the beautiful answer God gave me, I propose a challenge: In this season of love and gift giving, let us embrace God’s love for us.  FULLY!

Let’s drop all the weight of others’ expectations, the hurt of past failures that scream how unworthy we are and the let’s be done with the definitions of ourselves that are outside of what God says. Let’s make Valentine’s Day cards for ourselves and our loved ones from the Lord that say “you are fearfully and wonderfully made” and “I have loved you with an everlasting love.” God has shown me in different ways and through different people that we love others the way we believe we are loved. We do not have it in ourselves to love perfectly, but through Him, we can know that there are no exceptions to His love for us and love others in the same way.

When we can accept God’s love fully, then we can love others fully.   Can you imagine? Loving without offense, bitterness, or fear of being hurt?  God loves us, taking all that we are (and are not) into consideration. He never draws back or turns His heart away. Seriously, I want to love this way. The longing of my heart is to give love like this. Imagine the security, confidence and freedom we can have in our relationships, both with our spouses and others when are completed in God’s love and never looking for anything else to complete us. So my prayer for a while has been for God to perfect His love in me.

 
For this Valentine’s Day, I am giving my husband the freedom to be himself; all of himself, without paying a price for the parts I don’t agree with.  I am giving my children the acceptance they need to be exactly who they are without my imposed ideas because this is the way the Father loves me. Unapologetically.This Valentine’s Day, I am giving God a valentine.  I am giving God my trust.  Trust that His Word is true. Trust that He made me exactly the way He wants me to be.What are you going to give your Kings for this day of love?  Whatever you give, give in love and truth.

 

Dominique Nealond

Dominique Nealond
Lover of 2 Kings, Founder
Website: loverof2kings.com 
Facebook: Lover of Two Kings
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Reinforcing

His Greatness


Dominique Nealond
       

    Have you ever wondered what it is like to have the ultimate power of influence? You know the kind of influence that changes the atmosphere when a person walks in the room or that draws the very best out of people with a simple glance?  I have often thought of how it would feel to impact drastic change in hearts and outcomes of people’s lives. Then the Holy Spirit showed me that I absolutely possess this atmosphere altering dominance…and so do you! It just so happens it is with the most important person in your life; YOUR SPOUSE!

So, what do we do with it? It is for so much more than getting our husbands to wash the dishes or paint the room that has needed a touch-up for two years or unclog the sink.  Its application can help him to become everything that God created him to be.

It seems that now in our culture, there is a fight against the idea that a woman was made for a man. We strive to prove our independence in many facets of life and women are (rightfully) fighting for the many of the same benefits (equal pay, opportunities, etc.) as men. I believe that God created us equal–no doubt. But in order to embrace the fullness of my femininity, I have to accept the power of my influence and the importance of being a supportive wife. There are several ways to reinforce the greatness in your husband, a few things that work great for me are praying, remembering to be his friend, and then being my best.  

When we pray, we let God know not only that we care about our spouses, but that we trust His plan for them.  The best way to pray is “Thy will be done on earth as it is in Heaven.” God has countless thoughts towards us and our loved ones.Screen Shot 2017-01-24 at 7.39.13 PM So I like to pray that God would put us in position to make all of his thoughts towards us come to pass.

Also, when we pray, we can unload some of the stress that comes with being a great and supportive wife.  Prayer allows us to draw close to God and get filled and refilled on what we need to be what our families need.  Plus if there is an offense towards my hubby, I can talk to God about it and find out if I am in the wrong (which I am, more than I care to admit). It’s much better than arguing with him about it.

After prayer, a top priority in our home is friendship.  We laugh together, pray together, eat together, and sleep together.  It is the basis of our relationship, so when we need to attack a situation together, the foundation is already there. I do things with him that I never had interest in prior to meeting him. Like shooting our guns or watching a basketball game (without complaining).

Continuing to build our friendship also helps so that when I have constructive criticism, he knows I’m coming from a place of love and not judgment. Friendship with our spouses breaks down the barriers of obligation and we do the things that are needed out of delight and love for each other.  It causes a light atmosphere in our home that allows him to open up to me and share his hopes, dreams, and fears.  Then, I know what to take to God in prayer and what to get an action plan about.

Lastly, (through God) I am my best. That means, I spend quality time with the Lord to get what I need for myself. When I am the best me, our brains can fire together and we can make really good things happen. Whether it is coming up with a plan for a business venture or a simple tag team effort to feed and bathe Carver.  

Sug can then see the strengths that I bring to the table and allow me to play the role that will bring the best out of him and the challenges we encounter.  Through the basis of prayer and our friendship, he respects the qualities that God put in me to help him and doesn’t feel like I am nagging.  This gives me the best opportunity to help him and please God.

We know God is pleased when we are supportive in our marriages through a simple scripture that most (church) women have read many times:

Her husband is well known at the city gates, where he sits with the other civic leaders  Proverbs 31:23 NLT

Most of the scriptures in Proverbs 31 detail the actions of this noble woman and how she carries herself.  But the exception is verse 23. The key is though her husband holds the position; the honor is ascribed to her.  That’s right ladies…she gets the credit for his accomplishments!  Not that I am after credit, but it is great to be recognized every now and then for your efforts.

So not to say that your entire life is revolved around your husband’s hopes and dreams; but, it is to say that in accomplishing all that God has for you to do, helping hubby be successful in Christ is a major part of that. It is rewarding in our relationships with Christ and our hubbies.

So now that you know about that awesomeness inside you to influence, what do you plan to do with it?

 

Dominique Nealond

Dominique Nealond
Lover of 2 Kings, Founder
Website: loverof2kings.com 
Facebook: Lover of Two Kings
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THANKSGIVING CHALLENGE

2015

Heart Rings

READY FOR A CHALLENGE? TRY THIS ONE!

1. Each spouse grab a piece of paper. Starting tonight, write down one thing that you are thankful for about your spouse.

2. Do this every night until Thanksgiving Day.

3. Be thoughtful with what you write, BUT don’t cheat! You can not write down anything twice.

4. On Thanksgiving Day, roll up your paper and wrap it in a ribbon, flower, or something else meaningful. Then, take 10min out of your day, sit with each other and exchange or read to each other.

5. Enjoy and be present in this moment with each other. Remember that this day is not all about food and being with family, but about being grateful for the things that are easily overlooked or taken for granted.

Give-Thanks

Read some of our testimonies from the 2014 Thanksgiving Challenge!

“My husband and I exchanged ours this morning before the kids got up. It was so heartwarming and emotional. It feels so good to know that he really does notice and appreciates things I do for him.”    Michelle H.

“We exchanged our “Thanksgiving Challenge” this morning and it was fantastic to know what we don’t say to each other everyday. I love this woman.”  Matthew H.

“It was the best when I saw my husband and how he couldn’t go on reading it without holding back a tear. I loved his reaction. Thanks for the idea.”  Marisa G.

“We exchanged our list this morning and we had a few of the same things. We are so thankful for each other.”   Samantha D.

“My husband and I shared ours via email since he is deployed…I have been smiling all day!! God sure did bless me with a great man.”   Jazzy L.

“I did this for my husband and gave it to him yesterday morning before our day got crazy. He had a big smile while he read the list.”  Stephanie G.

Leave your testimonies below from your Thanksgiving Challenge!

Also, don’t forget to read the 5 Ways to Re-Build Broken Trust!

 

Lane 14th Anniversary-Final Gallery-0004

Mark and Laquilla Lane

Husband and Wife for Life Founders

 

5 Ways to Re-Build Broken Trust

Heart Rings       Trust, love, respect, communication and God are five important parts to your marriage that help build the foundation of a successful union. As we looked back on our years of marriage, we experienced that if both spouses have a sincere relationship with God……trust, love, respect and communication will ALL fall into place. For that is what God gives to us for trusting, believing and living for Him. 

But, when one of these vital parts are compromised, the marriage can become weak and begin to shake. Knowing how to re-build trust, re-love, re-gain respect, re-evaluate and change our communication, and know how to pray are the keys to lead us to the success that we all hope for in our relationship. We are going to tell you how to achieve all of these. In this article we are going to show you ways on how to re-build the trust in your marriage. Whatever your situation is, take one or all of these ways and apply them to your relationship. Share your results in the comment section below.

       1.Take responsibility for your mistake. Don’t shift the blame. Shifting the blame discredits your truth and creates a bigger barrier of mistrust.

       2. Give your spouse an opportunity to change. As long as they are changing, credit their progress and never bring up their mistake out of spite.

       3. Even if it may hurt, be completely honest with your spouse about the mistake. Answer all the what’s, when’s, where’s and how’s sincerely and truthfully. This is how the healing starts.

       4. Prove your words, with your actions. Your words are only as good as the actions you put behind it.

       5. Forgive. The true process of trusting again begins when forgiveness has taken place.

 

Our next article, 10 Ways to Successfully Communicate with Your Spouse, will show you easy ways to help encourage positive communication with your spouse so you can enjoy your conversations together.

 

Lane 14th Anniversary-Final Gallery-0004

Mark and Laquilla Lane

Husband and Wife for Life, Founders

25 Budget-Friendly Date Night Ideas

datingcouple

One of the most important factors in the success of a marriage is the level of effort that is put into it.  We get so busy with our everyday affairs, that we sometimes miss the opportunity to spend quality time with our spouse.  Spending time with your spouse does not have to require a lot of money, or securing a babysitter.  Dating each other should not have ended when you walked down the aisle, in holy matrimony. 

 That actually should have been the beginning, of many more romantic dates to come.  Keeping things fresh in your marriage, doesn’t have to be a budget killer. We’ve comprised a list of 25 budget-friendly date ideas, for you and your spouse to explore. We want you to continue to enjoy each other’s company, without throwing your finances completely out of whack.
Check out the list below, and allow yourself to think out the box, and keep the fire in your marriage burning strong.

 25 Inexpensive Date Night Ideas

1. Rent movies from the library. Your local library is a great resource, in that they have tons of movies available for you to check out completely FREE! This even includes new releases!

2. Have a private book club date night. Select a book to read together, and hold an intimate book club meeting for the two of you, after you’re both done with it.

3. Take $20 and head over to your local arcade, and just play video games and laugh all night long.

Click here to check out the other 22 date night ideas.

 

 

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America’s #1 Money Couple, Talaat and Tai McNeely are Financial Educators that are on a mission to get couples on the same page financially, and to experience the joys of financial freedom. Their website, HisandHerMoney.com has been featured in numerous publications around the world.

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Conceive Plus® $5 Promotion!

Young mother with her 2 years old little son dressed in pajamas are relaxing and playing in the bed at the weekend together, lazy morning, warm and cozy scene. Pastel colors, selective focus.

Young mother with her 2 years old little son dressed in pajamas are relaxing and playing in the bed at the weekend together, lazy morning, warm and cozy scene. Pastel colors, selective focus.

 

       If you’re trying to conceive and have been having some challenges, you DON’T want to miss this! We recently wrote an article about the benefits of using the product Conceive Plus® and the many positive reviews that came along with it. There were a large number of comments and eagerness of couples wanting to try it. Here’s your chance!

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Here’s one review from a excited couple with new baby girl!

“Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU Conceive Plus!! After years of trying and being told I would NEVER conceive, I now have a beautiful, two month old, baby girl!” Hear other reviews and testimonies here!

Our family also had the tough time conceiving after a stillborn delivery and months of postpartum depression. But, our dream of conceiving again finally came true! We want you to try this product also and receive the gift God wants for you. Children. Here are details on how to receive your promotion price:


 

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Go to Amazon.com :

Choose your product:

SASMAR Conceive Plus Fertility Lubricant OR

Sasmar Conceive Plus Multi-Use Fertility-Friendly Personal Lubricant for TTC Couples

Or go to Sasmar.com

2).

Enter the promocode : PROMO3CP (Expiration 30/11/2015)

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Write your Reviews!


 

Conceive Plus

Connect with Conceive Plus® on their Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest pages to catch all other product reviews and promotions, and to join a community of couples.

Facebook: Conceive Plus®

Twiiter: Conceive Plus®

Pinterest: Conceive Plus®

 

Mark and Laquilla

Mark and Laquilla Lane

Husband and Wife for Life, Founders

 

 

 

If you have just started trying or have been trying for a while, Conceive Plus® fertility lubricant can help increase your chances of getting pregnant naturally! Try it now for only 5$!

Advertorial from SASMAR Conceive Plus®. The opinions and text are all mine.

Comments Off on The Big Financial Trap That Is Destroying Marriages

The Big Financial Trap That is Destroying Marriages

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Society as a whole has been falsely programmed in believing that in order to thrive financially; we need to live off of two incomes in our households. That belief system is an absolute MYTH! It’s actually a terrible idea to base your financial lifestyle off of both you and your spouse’s income. As a matter of fact, you should live off of only one of your incomes. If the recent economic downturn of 2008 taught us anything, it’s that we need to be very careful with how we go about making large purchases.

You should never buy a house based off of two incomes, and most definitely you should not purchase a vehicle in that manner either. You may say, “Well in that case, we won’t be able to live at all”. That’s simply not true! If you make the conscious decision to base all of your major financial necessities off of one income, you will actually be living a much better life full of flexibility and options. We personally took this approach from the very beginning in our marriage, and have been able to avoid financial disaster as a result.

 

money and marriage

 

Steering Clear of the Trap
We made the purposeful decision, to live our life based simply on one of our incomes alone. We took into consideration the possibility that one day, becoming a stay at home mom could become to be a reality. We also considered the fact that one of us could one day be laid off from work. We knew for a fact, that we did not want our family to be stretched too thin financially. We knew that we would be placing ourselves on the brink of losing everything, if we instead built a lifestyle created on the basis of having two incomes. By using this approach, we were able to use the other person’s income to do other more meaningful things. As an example, while living off of one income, we used our second income to invest into a real estate venture.

This is an opportunity we would have not been able to take advantage of, if we needed both of our incomes to simply make ends meet. Having established this type of lifestyle allowed us to jump into the investment world with both feet, without being afraid. More importantly, we were also able to give more to our local church, as well as to people that were in need. Additionally, we went on family vacations, and even dined out at a few fancy places from time to time. One of the biggest financial benefits was that we were able to continuously add to our growing savings and investment accounts.

 

Big Time Decisions
Our fortitude was really put to the test, by the time we had our second child. I made the big time decision to come home and stay with our children. It started to become really challenging juggling work schedules, child care, cooking dinner, and all of the millions of obligations that come along with being a career woman. So for me personally, the best thing to do was to come home full time. Surprisingly, this actually became an easy transition for me. The key ingredient that made the transition a smooth one, was the fact that we had already established a level of lifestyle that did not involve my income. As a matter of fact, we ended up purchasing a larger home for our growing family shortly thereafter. By God’s grace, we were able to do so, strictly based on my husband’s income!

How many people are working at a job that they can’t stand, simply because they have to keep up with their lifestyle, and all the payments that come along with it? If we would have based all of our financial needs off of both of our incomes, there is no way that I would’ve been able to follow my heart’s desire and come home full time with our children. It brings me so much joy when I can take our children to school, without thinking about impending bills to pay, based on me working outside of the home. It’s something that you can get use to very quickly. We would not have been able to do this, if we did not BUDGET our life based solely on one income!

moneymarriage

Why Not You?
Creating and sticking to a budget every single month, is what has allowed us to properly use my husband’s salary more efficiently. If you are in a household with two incomes, take the next couple of months and do a trial run. Make all of your financial decisions based off of one of your salaries. You may have to cut back on some things to make it work. However, you will quickly find out that it’s simply the best way for you to establish your lifestyle. Nobody knows for certain what’s awaiting them down the road. However, we can all proactively plan for our future in the best way that we know how.

 

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Talaat and Tai McNeely
His and Her Money | Personal Finance Educators

info@HisandHerMoney(dot)com
www.HisandHerMoney.com

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Ignite your Spark!

View More: http://zestzealphoto.pass.us/laneanniversaryIntimacy is an vital part the longevity of a healthy marriage. Kissing, holding hands, hugging, touching and sexual intercourse are all positive ways of expressing love for each other. These sacred times with just you and your spouse will intensify the bond you share and ignite the sparks of romance and passion. Not only should intimacy be exciting, but it needs to be enjoyable as well. We’ve partnered with SASMAR, who is the leading provider in excellent personal lubricants. From warming to flavored lubricants, they can help make the sexual experience with your spouse more pleasurable and creative.

SasMar

Being creative in the bedroom and sharing your intimacy ideas will help you learn more about your spouses needs and desires, and also help your communication become more open and honest. What a way to increase the connection with your spouse! Take control over your bedrooms spontaneity and watch a change happen in your relationship. Get a special 10% off using Coupon Code: love-sasmar and get your SASMAR products here: SASMAR Personal Lubricants.

Watch their reviews and don’t forget to leave yours!

Laquilla L.

Manufactured in France without sugar, oils or parabens… SASMAR personal lubricants help to enhance intimacy and pleasure, once you try them you’ll never use anything else!

FDA cleared and loved in more than 60 countries!

 

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of SASMAR®. The opinions and text are all mine.

Money Tips and More

with Tai and Talaat!

www.HisandHerMoney.com

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Money is one of the number one reasons why marriages fall apart. It can be difficult to get both spouses on the same page financially. What happens when a saver marries a spender? Well…that’s our story. Let us formally introduce ourselves; we are Talaat and Tai McNeely founders of HisandHerMoney.com. Before our marriage ever began, we found ourselves in quite a difficult situation.
We were total opposites when it came to how we handled our finances. Talaat was a natural spender who was deep in debt with a bad terrible credit score. Conversely, Tai was a natural saver who had no debt whatsoever and coupled that feat with an outstanding credit score. We were faced with many questions prior to us getting married.

 
•    Do we let our credit scores dictate if we are compatible for marriage?
•    How will our previous money habits play a role in our marriage?
•    Do we merge our finances together?
•    How can we work together to become better at life and win with money?
•    Is there any hope for our future?
•    What does it feel like when one spouse has zero debt to now having $30,000 in debt?
•    Am I a loser because I have now made my debt problems my future spouse’s problems?
•    Can I change or is my past really who I am?
•    Should I have a secret account just in case our money situation gets worse?
•    How will we purchase a home? Do we put it in both of our names and risk having a low interest rate due to the lower credit score?
•    Do I have to take full responsibility for our finances simply because I’m better at it?
•    When do we start to expand our family?
•    Will we have to rely on two incomes to run our home?
•    What will our lives look like 5 years from now?

 

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You can read more about our story here:
By the grace of God we made it through a difficult time in our relationship and we have been married for 9 years! This has not been a cake walk, but it has been rewarding. We came together as a TEAM and became totally debt free! We are on a mission to save marriages and teach them how to work together and win with money.
We will share money tips and articles here on HusbandandWifeforLife.com to help you gain control over your finances. What would you do if money was not an option? What goals and dreams do you aspire to achieve? What is holding you back? Is it possibly money, or maybe a job that you have to work at, to pay bills that you don’t want to pay?
We’ve been in debt, lots of debt…………. TWICE! We started our marriage off weighed down with various types of debt including car loans, signature bank loans, payday loans, credit card debt to name a few. To date we have totally eliminated every ounce of consumer debt and are DEBT FREE! We are now on a mission to totally eliminate our home mortgage! There was nothing easy or magical about the process. It took a great deal of hard work and dedication.  It was hard work…because in our eyes it was a huge amount of debt, that was going to take time and perseverance to make it through.
It took a great deal of dedication because of the fact that ALL of the debt that we began our marriage with came from ONE spouse. We put in a ton of work together to climb out the pit of debt and get ourselves on solid footing financially. It is our goal to show you how we did it and encourage you to realize that you can do it too.

 

HNH MoneyTalaat and Tai McNeely
His and Her Money | Founders & Editors

hisandhermoneyblog@gmail.com
www.HisandHerMoney.com